Self-Harm

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 5:47 pm

wow .. how incredibly insensitive.

Waiting to Exist · Post by **Waiting to Exist** » 10/9/2004, 5:57 pm

What? That I don't want to see my mother or anyone hurting themselves for dumbass reasons?

God, what an ass am I.

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 5:58 pm

who are you to say her reasons were dumb?
or anyone's reasons for that matter.
it's really not your call to make.

Waiting to Exist · Post by **Waiting to Exist** » 10/9/2004, 5:59 pm

There is no reason that justifies cutting oneself.

NO reason.

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 6:01 pm

maybe no reason that you understand

Waiting to Exist · Post by **Waiting to Exist** » 10/9/2004, 6:03 pm

Then by all means, educate me.

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 6:03 pm

educate yourself

Waiting to Exist · Post by **Waiting to Exist** » 10/9/2004, 6:04 pm

How do I go about that? I ain't about to go cutting myself.

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 6:06 pm

have you even bothered to read through this thread?
or are you seriously that fucking clueless?

Waiting to Exist · Post by **Waiting to Exist** » 10/9/2004, 6:07 pm

Hey, Fucking Clueless is my name.

I hate my parents.

EDIT: On a serious note, I know I'm not going to make you stop cutting. I know it doesn't work like that. But telling me, "You don't understand cutting," and, "Things are different for us cutters" isn't going to stop me thinking it's fucking stupid.

Rusty · Post by **Rusty** » 10/9/2004, 6:50 pm

This discussion got seriously out of hand. This thread is just creating arguments and stuff now.

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » 10/9/2004, 7:30 pm

Waiting to Exist wrote:What the hell are you on about? I still loved her. I even supported her and kept my anger bottled up. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to come off as Mr. Brave-and-Noble or some shit, but don't try and kid me by saying I have a problem for being pissed because my mother can't deal with her own shit.

wow, you sir are an idiot.

As for cutters, it is my belief that people cut for a reason or reasons. Something in that persons life may not being going well or something else may be bothering them. After all who knows and I am not going to ask why. Why do I say that? Its because I don't understand why people would want to cut themselves. I do think that cutting is unnecessary but, I believe that its a outlet for some people to aliviate pain, just like someone would have drink, get high etc. But thats enough out of me.

end statement

Korzic · Post by **Korzic** » 10/9/2004, 7:50 pm

Putting the anger aside. I go back to my "you don't understand" thing. I've read up on self harming. I even went so far as to wade through most of the 78 pages of thread on that forum I linked earlier. I'm still no closer to understanding why cutting is the answer as opposed to half the alternatives that were listed in the DO THIS INSTEAD OF CUTTING thread. I dont understand why carving up your arm is the answer. Why not do something as equally destructive as dripping acid onto your arm? Or holding a lighter up to your arm and burning yourself ( although I think some people do this) Or using a cheese grater on your arm instead. Each of those methods is equally as destructive as the other.

I'm not going to open myself up to try and understand why cutting yourself is a better method than running a marathon. I'm sure there are plenty of people in the same place as you guys who DON'T self harm but do something else instead to calm down.

To me it seems "cutters" seem to think themselves an elitist group and if you don't get it you're either too stupid or ignorant/insensitive or both.

So instead of fobbing most of us off because we don't get it. try explaining the rationale behind turning your arm into reverlets of blood and knife wounds.

Joey · Post by **Joey** » 10/9/2004, 7:51 pm

Rusty wrote:This discussion got seriously out of hand. This thread is just creating arguments and stuff now.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. That's what happens when something so incredibly personal becomes the topic on a messageboard.

If you can't post with a level of sensitivity to the people the topic is in reference to, then stay out of it. It's one thing to say you don't get it, or you don't understand it, that's fine .. it's a whole other issue when you say such things as "it's fucking stupid." It's easy to talk shit about something you don't understand. Not to mention the fact that it's been brought to my attention how even reading through this thread has had triggering effects and this topic should not be allowed to continue in this way.

I agree that people need to become more aware of how serious this issue is, but I'm sorry, a message board is NOT the place for it.

There's only so many ways an explanation can be given and we've all given explanations numerous times, whether you understand the rationale behind the explanations given is your problem, not ours. Everybody has their own methods of dealing with things, if you think running a race will help you, then run until you fucking fall over .. that method won't work for everyone .. nobody here is asking for "suggestions" on how to stop .. nobody here is asking for help or advice or what YOU think is better to help cope with pain. You want to understand it so badly .. read books on the topic, surf the websites .. don't expect someone to open up their fucking heart and lay their emotions out on the line for your analyzation on a message board .. why is that so hard to understand?

It's very interesting how political threads are locked within seconds of an argument breaking out for fear of offending people .. yet topics like this which can have even more devastating effects are left open for people to say whatever the hell they want in. Makes a whole lot of sense.

Dr. Hobo · Post by **Dr. Hobo** » 10/9/2004, 8:24 pm

campbell et. al..
i havent cut
but i do think i have a fairly good understanding of the logic and of the mind frame given that some of the people closest to me in my life over the years have cut.. it was them who stopped me from starting in the first place
i have had (and to a lesser extent still do have) a bout with depression thats helped me both understand and somewhat help my friends thru their tough times
the first thing i learned about cutting.. its an addiction
how can one truly define or explain an addiction?
how do you logically explain or rationalize an addiction?

going back to the smoking example..
"i dont want to smoke anymore but.. fuckin hell i cant stop"

to begin with, willingly putting chemicals into ones body isnt rational or logical
(unless to say that by making the choice to smoke is that persons free will and by making an educated decision fully knowing the consequences of said decision they would be making a rational decision)
but if one were to use that argument about smoking.. then why not about cutting? or about heavy drugs or about anything else?

people who start to cut do so for reasons that (usually) are more for them to deal with.. should they go seek help about it? yeah.. but is "seeking help" as easy as typing it out ? no
its easy for me to say i think you should see a doctor.. but in my heart i know its not easy and in my heart i know its not always going to be best thing for one to do
my treatment went as far as electro-shock therapy because meds didnt work as well as they should have or as long as was hoped by both the docs and myself
i also went to a total of 6 or 7 docs and a psychologist (and a neurologist when my psychiatrist had no clue what was wrong and thought i may have something physically wrong like a tumour)

i had a friend who did seek help from a professional
that professional's choice for solving the problem was to lock her up in a hospital for a week or 2 at a time.. she'd call me from the hospital in tears and we'd talk for a while because everyone treated her like a baby .. and when she'd get out she'd go back to highschool and everyone would stare at her or make fun of her..
i know for a fact that she was better off the day she stopped seeing docs and dealt with things on her own and when she was ready

im going to be adding to this post as i think of what i want to say.. cutting is something that is close to my heart for some of the people closest to me in my life have cut at one point or another.. including the friend who convinced me to tell my folks i tried to OD a few years ago.

if you have questions or if something i said doesnt make much sense let me know.. im tired, my brains fairly burnt out from all the school work i have and im very hungry so i may not make all that much sense but i do understand where you guys are coming from in terms of not understanding and at the same time.. i do understand things from joey and cole's perspective after some 3-4 years of talking to people who do it and almost starting myself..

if you guys prefer (out of respect to cole 'n joey) to discuss this on either pm, msn, aim, etc then i'm perfectly willing to do that as well (or in campbell's case the hub since im usually there lol)

and finally
for waiting to exist.. i cant remember your name.. but yeah.. theres 6 billion ppl on this planet and well unfortunately not all of us can deal with our problems the same way get over it and pull that stick out of your ass.. seriously. is everyone who suffers from mental issues of any type "fucking stupid" or whatever? i tried to kill myself not once but twice.. does that make me fucking stupid? heh.. im fairly sure that you do understand that some folks with mental issues have chemical imbalances.. do you know how hard it is to live with one or how enjoyable it is? cause if you do.. then i have nothing else to say.. actually i do.. you're attitude and what not seem to be more caused by your apparent hate for your parents which to me looks like you seem to be taking out on "cutters as a whole" which is also wrong.

Post by **xjsb125** » 10/9/2004, 8:33 pm

Well said Sand. I am going to ask that the rest of you move on to PM to continue this. I believe it is a very safe assumption to say that a lot of us on the board just don't understand. I don't. I don't know that I ever can. I never fought hard depression like some of you. Mine wasn't as serious, and I just can't grasp how some of you feel inside. It's not even my business, and for that matter I don't guess it's anyone elses.

nikki4982 · Post by **nikki4982** » 10/10/2004, 2:24 am

Joey wrote:It's very interesting how political threads are locked within seconds of an argument breaking out for fear of offending people .. yet topics like this which can have even more devastating effects are left open for people to say whatever the hell they want in. Makes a whole lot of sense.

Actually, I've been monitoring this thread very closely every time I come on (which is almost always after everyone's gone to bed), and I've been tempted to lock it numerous times, but kept reading on and it always seemed to end on a semi-decent note and I thought the thread would end or go on as an understanding discussion. I was obviously wrong, and I'm very sorry I didn't lock it. I honestly thought the cutters in the thread talking about it with each other was a positive thing and didn't want to stop that. Once again, I'm sorry for not locking it sooner, and although Matt didn't do it, I'm going to to be on the cautious side.