Self-Harm

[Joey]

[Waiting to Exist]

[Joey]

[Waiting to Exist]

[Joey]

[Waiting to Exist]

[Joey]

[Waiting to Exist]

[Joey]

[Waiting to Exist]

[Rusty]

[Johnny]

[Korzic]

[Joey]

[Dr. Hobo]

campbell et. al..
i havent cut
but i do think i have a fairly good understanding of the logic and of the mind frame given that some of the people closest to me in my life over the years have cut.. it was them who stopped me from starting in the first place
i have had (and to a lesser extent still do have) a bout with depression thats helped me both understand and somewhat help my friends thru their tough times
the first thing i learned about cutting.. its an addiction
how can one truly define or explain an addiction?
how do you logically explain or rationalize an addiction?

going back to the smoking example..
"i dont want to smoke anymore but.. fuckin hell i cant stop"

to begin with, willingly putting chemicals into ones body isnt rational or logical
(unless to say that by making the choice to smoke is that persons free will and by making an educated decision fully knowing the consequences of said decision they would be making a rational decision)
but if one were to use that argument about smoking.. then why not about cutting? or about heavy drugs or about anything else?

people who start to cut do so for reasons that (usually) are more for them to deal with.. should they go seek help about it? yeah.. but is "seeking help" as easy as typing it out ? no
its easy for me to say i think you should see a doctor.. but in my heart i know its not easy and in my heart i know its not always going to be best thing for one to do
my treatment went as far as electro-shock therapy because meds didnt work as well as they should have or as long as was hoped by both the docs and myself
i also went to a total of 6 or 7 docs and a psychologist (and a neurologist when my psychiatrist had no clue what was wrong and thought i may have something physically wrong like a tumour)

i had a friend who did seek help from a professional
that professional's choice for solving the problem was to lock her up in a hospital for a week or 2 at a time.. she'd call me from the hospital in tears and we'd talk for a while because everyone treated her like a baby .. and when she'd get out she'd go back to highschool and everyone would stare at her or make fun of her..
i know for a fact that she was better off the day she stopped seeing docs and dealt with things on her own and when she was ready

im going to be adding to this post as i think of what i want to say.. cutting is something that is close to my heart for some of the people closest to me in my life have cut at one point or another.. including the friend who convinced me to tell my folks i tried to OD a few years ago.

if you have questions or if something i said doesnt make much sense let me know.. im tired, my brains fairly burnt out from all the school work i have and im very hungry so i may not make all that much sense but i do understand where you guys are coming from in terms of not understanding and at the same time.. i do understand things from joey and cole's perspective after some 3-4 years of talking to people who do it and almost starting myself..

if you guys prefer (out of respect to cole 'n joey) to discuss this on either pm, msn, aim, etc then i'm perfectly willing to do that as well (or in campbell's case the hub since im usually there lol)


and finally
for waiting to exist.. i cant remember your name.. but yeah.. theres 6 billion ppl on this planet and well unfortunately not all of us can deal with our problems the same way get over it and pull that stick out of your ass.. seriously. is everyone who suffers from mental issues of any type "fucking stupid" or whatever? i tried to kill myself not once but twice.. does that make me fucking stupid? heh.. im fairly sure that you do understand that some folks with mental issues have chemical imbalances.. do you know how hard it is to live with one or how enjoyable it is? cause if you do.. then i have nothing else to say.. actually i do.. you're attitude and what not seem to be more caused by your apparent hate for your parents which to me looks like you seem to be taking out on "cutters as a whole" which is also wrong.

[xjsb125]

Well said Sand. I am going to ask that the rest of you move on to PM to continue this. I believe it is a very safe assumption to say that a lot of us on the board just don't understand. I don't. I don't know that I ever can. I never fought hard depression like some of you. Mine wasn't as serious, and I just can't grasp how some of you feel inside. It's not even my business, and for that matter I don't guess it's anyone elses.

[nikki4982]