I have a funny drunken story: This one time, last summer, a group of us all went out to my fiance's lake house for a nite full of alcohol and asshole. Well......out of the 6 of us, one didn't drink.
Later on during the nite, around 11ish, we decided we wanted to go to the truck stop for a bite to eat. So.....we drove.
On the way, we noticed a car pulled over with its hazard lights on. They had car issues. Neil wanted to help. (hehe....so they thought) We pulled over, and I asked if they were having problems.....they told me "no" and that supposedly somebody was on the way to help them out.
I had stumbled my way out of the car (already cocked half circle) and asked if they were SURE they had somebody coming. I think they could tell I was drunk because they kinda got this stupid look on their face.
I was like.......well, just in case you're out of gas, let me help you. I un-screwed the cap to their gas tank, pulled down my shorts 'n boxers, and SHIT THE GROSSEST sounding ANAL FUME I could have let go at the time.
Everybody in the car is dying laughing, I'm laughing......the two in the car are bitching at me, and I was like "sorry, I just wanted to feel like I was able to help somehow before we drove off".

Hatred is gained as much by good works as by evil. - Niccoló Machiavelli