The ASK LANDO! Thread

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Did you want to escape, try to escape the population?
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trentm32
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Post by trentm32 »

Lando, why is the little old woman that's my Western Civilizations professor a drunk?
"When looking up there, I just felt whole, like I belonged. Like one day I too would shine my most brilliant. Sitting there also made me think about sitting through services at my little country church back home. About that never-changing congregation of the same sixty-seven people and everyone has known you since before you were born. Now, out here in the real world, everything just seemed more vivid than when I used to sit in that little pew. That pew that was now so, so far away from where I was. I feared I had somehow left God behind there, too. I feared he was somehow just sitting there, saving my seat on the fifth pew from the front row, just waiting on me to come back. I left so quickly, I worried that he may not have noticed I was gone. And, now, I’m just too far away to find. So he’s just sitting there, patiently waiting on me to come back. I closed my eyes and prayed a moment. I hoped more than anything that he could still hear me." -an excerpt from my novella, A Sea of Fallen Leaves.

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xoNoDoubt69
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Post by xoNoDoubt69 »

Lando, why do my neighbors insist on making so much noise causing me not being able to sleep?
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thirdhour
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Post by thirdhour »

Melissa, did you change the way your screenname looks somehow? It looks different :freak:
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Post by clumsychild_ »

Lando, why are you so slow to answer everyone's questions?
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Post by Joe Cooler »

^ I was just gonna ask that. :nod:
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Post by Lando »

carnival_7 wrote:Lando, my back hurts. What do i do?


Get a massage from me! no no no get one from a professional massage therapist, but avoid seeing the chiropractor. Some of them really aren't educated as well as they should be.
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Post by Lando »

saman wrote:Lando, I find myself constantly angry these days. how can i feel better?

also, why do my fingers want to type your nick as londo instead of lando?


First question.

This works especially well for people who generally do not curse. What you need to do is go outside, usually a wide open space feels better, than being in a closed in area, but what you do is yell and scream and swear, say every profanity you can think of and yell about some of the things that are bugging you in your life right now too if you want. When you're done, you'll either have a ton of energy to go out and do something HOPEFULLY constructive which will make you feel better, or you'll feel relaxed and everything will be better. Either way, it's a sure fire way to fix the anger temporarily.

Question 2.


My guess is you've read old writings by Jeffrey Chaucer and in these writings to say LAND, he uses LOND from time to time. So technically, LOND-O and LAND-O are the same thing, if you're Chaucer... are you him?

and if so can I have your autograph?
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Post by Lando »

Joe Cool wrote:She's from Saskatchewan, what do you expect???


For her to be awesome.


Oh... that question wasn't for me.


But still,

For her to be awesome.
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Post by Lando »

superboots wrote:lando, why do i suck at developing pictures?


Simple! Don't go getting your panties in a twist and stress out!

You see, it's common knowledge that there are two kinds of people.

People who can grow tomatoes and people who can develop pictures!

You're just one of the expert tomato growers, but that's okay, it's cool too because you can grow a kick ass tomato and then take a picture of it and have someone develop it for you.

Frame it. Hang it on the wall if you like, and tell everyone your story when they see the greatness that is the tomato.
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Post by Lando »

trentm32 wrote:Lando, why is the little old woman that's my Western Civilizations professor a drunk?


Because she hasn't been in bed with a man in 13 years.
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Post by Lando »

xoNoDoubt69 wrote:Lando, why do my neighbors insist on making so much noise causing me not being able to sleep?


Some people just get more sex than others do. If you were in their shoes you wouldn't care about the neighbours either!


Then again.... If they're only wearing shoes while doing it... Well that's just a little odd now isn't it? Unless he's wearing Reebok Pumps...

Sweet...
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Post by Lando »

thirdhour wrote:Melissa, did you change the way your screenname looks somehow? It looks different :freak:


My name isn't Melissa and the answer is NO. You're just on heavy heavy drugs. Now you're seeing what happens when you eat all the PURPLE flintstone vitamins at once.
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Post by Lando »

clumsychild_ wrote:Lando, why are you so slow to answer everyone's questions?


DO NOT OFFEND ME WITH SUCH INSOLENCE!

I am your GOD!

Bow down and kiss my non-existant feet!





OR


I've been really busy lately.

Answering prayers and all...

Or just busy.

Since I can't hear prayers.

And I'm not God.

And I wipe my own ass.

And I do actually have feet.

Existant ones.
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Post by Lando »

Joe Cool wrote:^ I was just gonna ask that. :nod:


Well Timmy that's what happens when you're slower than a box of Cracker Jacks.
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Post by Johnny »

Lando, My life is stuck in a rut. What can I do?
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Post by Joe Cooler »

Lando wrote:
Joe Cool wrote:^ I was just gonna ask that. :nod:


Well Timmy that's what happens when you're slower than a box of Cracker Jacks.


I wish my name was Timmy. :(
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Post by dream in japanese »

Lando, what does a rock teach me about teaching children? and why do i have to write a paper on this? and why are my professors mentally insane?
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Post by saman »

Lando wrote:
Joe Cool wrote:She's from Saskatchewan, what do you expect???


For her to be awesome.


Oh... that question wasn't for me.


But still,

For her to be awesome.


*gasp* i AM awesome! how did you know?!

and no, i'm not chaucer. you can still have my autograph though
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Post by Penguin Josh »

lando why is chemistry sooooooooooooooooooooooo easy?
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