ClumsyMonkey.net

this was taken from my school newspaper

http://www.michigandaily.com/vnews/disp ... 9d07c944c8



thanks to sarah for finding this

1) Never wear the shirt of the band you’re about to see. In the words of Jeremy Piven (in “P.C.U.”), “Don’t be that guy.” Even worse, never wear the shirt you just bought at the merch stand. Instead, wear the shirt of a labelmate, or a side project. It shows your obscure music knowledge, which is important above all else. The general rule of thumb is to look like you put no effort into your appearance whatsoever, even if that means spending hours beforehand trying on different under-sized T-shirt and thrift store pants combinations.

This is True.

5) Front row is the place to be. The goal is the fabled “under the rail” spot. Obtaining this musical Babylon is however, a very difficult task. Try making up a zine (you probably write one anyway) and finagling a photo pass. The door guys are often jerks, so this can backfire without the proper credentials. Instead, try the classic, “Dude, my girl/boyfriend is up there.” If that fails, grab a bunch of water bottles and make your way up there on the pretense of being with the band, Mentos style. Remember, this is only allowed up until the age of 24. At that point, you are required to turn in your scene card, shelve your copy of “Catcher in the Rye” and hang in the back by the bar, looking bored.

It's funny cause I've seen people do this. But i have seen 30 yr olds in the front row

6) Crowd surfing is lame. End of discussion. Also, if you’re that one dude who still thinks it’s cool to yell “Play Freebird!” then call me so I can come over and kick your ass

Crowd Surfers are the most annoying people!

hahahah... that's too funny

that's awesome, and pretty accurate.

i've read that before, but the version i read was longer.

i knew doing the rock lobster was cool

wish i new what the rock lobster was..

guess i'll never be cool

i've read things like that before so i didn't find it that funny, but that guy is pretty cute, how come he doesn't go to the university of utah?

I didn't bother to read the list, but they better have this on there, or something along the lines of:

If you're at a reggae concert, and you want to move around, starting a mosh pit is not fucking acceptable. People are there to enjoy the music, not deal with your flying elbows. And no, I don't feel bad for throwing you down into broken glass and making you bleed, you got what you deserve you dirty dirty cunt.

Or even:

If there's no music playing, then there's no need to push forward. Guess what? There's a metal railing in the front for the people that get there insanely early to earn that spot up front. I don't care if you showed up an hour late, you're not getting my fucking spot no matter how hard you try. The only way to get me to budge is to break my ribs so I can't breathe.

Maybe I should read the list before posting this, but hey, I am angry about people. I will never go to another show that isn't 18+ ever again.

those weren't on the list, but should've been.

xonodoubt69 wrote::lol: It's funny cause I've seen people do this. But i have seen 30 yr olds in the front row

Hey hey, when we're 30, I'm still gonna be dragging you to concerts at noon, so we can be front row.

6) Crowd surfing is lame. End of discussion. Also, if you’re that one dude who still thinks it’s cool to yell “Play Freebird!” then call me so I can come over and kick your ass

Someone yelled "FREEBIRD" at OLP's Central Park show.

nikki4982 wrote:

xonodoubt69 wrote::lol: It's funny cause I've seen people do this. But i have seen 30 yr olds in the front row

Hey hey, when we're 30, I'm still gonna be dragging you to concerts at noon, so we can be front row.

*runs far,far away*

*chases*

Hey, it's only about 8 years away.