The League of Extraordinary Shit
Posted: 7/11/2003, 9:57 am
That is a better-fitting name for this movie. I haven't seen such complete and utter bastardization of a source material since... well... since... uh... okay, this movie takes the cake in terms of just making comics look bad... and it is the cinematic version of both herpes and the clap. It sucks.
Why? Well, acting goes from good to "1st-grade musical reenactment of Romeo & Juliet" bad. The plot is so muddled, the characters so two-dimensional, the special effects so crappy (the Jekyll-to-Hyde transformation? YELLOW LIGHT FILLS SCREEN, we cut back to a 25% changed Jekyll/Hyde, and then it does it again until he's completely changed into one form or the other), the complete lack of explanations of how certain things happen, completely and utterly unparalleled. There is this one point in the movie, where it SHOULD be exciting but isn't, where Tom Sawyer is stuck in an explosion. He then appears about two minutes later without a scratch. Well, one, I THINK, but you don't see it.
What's good? Skinner, the invisible man. He just reeks of the type of carefree anti-hero that you could've centered this damn movie around and maybe made a little better. But he disappears for a third of the movie, which royally pissed me off.
And, oh yeah. The ending? Corniest, dumbest, most utterly ridiculous movie ending since Friday The 13th Part III (where Mrs. Voorhees comes up from Crystal Lake and pulls the girl down).
Manos: The Hand of Fate was better than this. No joke. Save your money and hope that next week, Bad Boys II or How To Deal or Johnny English manages to actually be good.
Or wait for the week after and see Seabiscuit.
But don't see this. For the love of Sean Connery's once-great career, folks, don't see this.
Why? Well, acting goes from good to "1st-grade musical reenactment of Romeo & Juliet" bad. The plot is so muddled, the characters so two-dimensional, the special effects so crappy (the Jekyll-to-Hyde transformation? YELLOW LIGHT FILLS SCREEN, we cut back to a 25% changed Jekyll/Hyde, and then it does it again until he's completely changed into one form or the other), the complete lack of explanations of how certain things happen, completely and utterly unparalleled. There is this one point in the movie, where it SHOULD be exciting but isn't, where Tom Sawyer is stuck in an explosion. He then appears about two minutes later without a scratch. Well, one, I THINK, but you don't see it.
What's good? Skinner, the invisible man. He just reeks of the type of carefree anti-hero that you could've centered this damn movie around and maybe made a little better. But he disappears for a third of the movie, which royally pissed me off.
And, oh yeah. The ending? Corniest, dumbest, most utterly ridiculous movie ending since Friday The 13th Part III (where Mrs. Voorhees comes up from Crystal Lake and pulls the girl down).
Manos: The Hand of Fate was better than this. No joke. Save your money and hope that next week, Bad Boys II or How To Deal or Johnny English manages to actually be good.
Or wait for the week after and see Seabiscuit.
But don't see this. For the love of Sean Connery's once-great career, folks, don't see this.
)
I took my fiance to see that last nite actually and I enjoyed it. Plus, it's Reese, ya's know me 
. Man I'm bored.
I'm seeing it tomorrow.
