ClumsyMonkey.net

I don't remember the exact words, but...

Smithers: I'll kick that old geezer in his *yells* bony old behind! *echos "bony old behind, bony old behind..."

*scene changes to Homer and Mr.Burns hiking*

*Mr.Burns hears the echo of "bony old behind!"*

Burns: Why, thank you Simpson, I have been working out...



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Homer: "Stupid, sexy Flanders."

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Bart: You mean its not me noggon, its me peepers?!

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Homber: Ahh!!! Cobras!!

bart: "homer.. no offense or anything but your half-assed underparenting was better than your half-assed overparentig

homer: "but im using my whole ass "

Bart *rocking back and forth*: Can't sleep, clown will eat me. Can't sleep, clown will eat me...

Inspired by tonight's episode on the Comedy Channel ---


*Homer singing to the tune of 'The Flintstones' theme*:

"Simpson. Homer Simpson. He's the greatest guy in history...! from the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree...!!!"

Marge: How much is this aspirin?
Apu: $23.99
Marge: 23.99!?!
Apu: I lowered the price because an escaped mental patient tampered with the bottle.

The Simpsons=

There are so many hilarious episodes. The one where Homer gets addicted to medical marijuana, and the tomaco episode are

One of the most hilarious is the Planet of the Apes musical:

(singing)"I hate every chimp I see,
from chimpan-a to chimpan-z.
Oh you'll never make a monkey out of me"

(Statue of Liberty rises)

O my! I was wrong!
It was Earth, all along!
You've finally made a monkey,

Apes: Yes we've finally made a monkey,

Troy: Yes you've

& Apes: finally made a monkey out of me!

Troy: I love you, Dr. Zaius!"


"Internet. Is that thing still around"-Homer

Homer: We need a name that's cutting edge. Like Cut Co. Slash Com. Inter-Slice.

Ralph: Oh look daddy! A whale egg!

Man: Give her these. *hands two pills* Then these. *two more pills* Then these. *hands whole pile of pills*
Selma: Oh thank you doctor.
Man: Oh, I'm not a doctor.

Hans Moleman: Alcohol ruined my life. I'm thirty eight years old!

Haha! That pill one was just on.

Ooh, here's one...

Lisa: We're the MTV generation. We don't have highs or lows.
Homer: What's that like?
Lisa: Meh.

Marge: Compuglobalhypermeganet


Let me spell it out for the kids.

Compu-Global-Hyper-Mega-Net

This morning I woke up at 4:30 singing this song... it was kinda weird.


Lisa and Grandma Simpson singing:
"How many roads must a man walk down, before you can call him a man?"

Homer:
"Twelve!"

Lisa:
"No, dad, it's a rhetorical question."

Homer:
"Rhetorical, eh...? Seven!"

And another one of my personal favourites...

Clicky, clicky
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Bart:
Lisa, her teeth are big and green.
Lisa, she smells like gasoline.

Homer: Got your nose!
Younger Bart: Got your wallet!
*runs over and flushes it down the toliet*
Homer: D'oh!

*later on, Bart still at the toliet*
Bart: Bye bye keys!

*Bart naked, swinging around on clothesline*
Bart: Wee! Wee! Wee!
Homer: I'm sure he'll get tired soon.
*later that night*
Bart: Wee! Wee! Wee!

Marge: I have some good news Homer. There's going to be twice as much love in this house.
Homer: Were gonna start doing it in the mornings now?

Ralph: "...and I want a pony..."
Hosey the Bear: "But you're not going to start any fires, right?"
Ralph: "At my house, we call them uh-ohs!"

Mayor's Bodyguard: Sir, there's an angry mob here to see you.
Quimby: Do they have an appointment?
Bodyguard: Yes, in fact they do.
Skinner: I phoned ahead!