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Posted: 4/8/2005, 5:19 pm
by Rusty
What's the matter Claire?

Posted: 4/10/2005, 8:54 am
by afealicious
:GASP: why?

Posted: 4/10/2005, 9:05 am
by afealicious
eurrrgh i haven't been here in a while.
so i'll post this picture.

Image
:GASP:

Posted: 4/10/2005, 12:54 pm
by Rusty
:GASP: Sweet.

Posted: 4/10/2005, 9:11 pm
by Rusty
Fuck. Fucking piece of fucking shit, fuck this fuck fuckity FUCK! Where the fuck did that fucking fuck thread go?! FUCK!

Posted: 4/10/2005, 9:21 pm
by xoNoDoubt69
i agree.

Posted: 4/10/2005, 9:30 pm
by beautiful liar
so i've done fuckall this weekend. and i'm not going to do anything. brett (not cm brett) was right about me burning out. i feel incapable. but right now i'm takin comfort in the smell of weed that i didnt smoke but seem to have a buzz hanging around from the secondhand inhalation. i love the smell of good pot. im shooting myself in hte foot, but i'm so freakin stressed. it's okay. i think i might drop AP history. i can't do everything, and i'll get plenty of history courses anyways. i dunno. *sigh* i'm so tired.

Posted: 4/11/2005, 5:17 pm
by Rusty
Well this week went straight to hell.

Posted: 4/17/2005, 9:10 pm
by beautiful liar
A writer's life
is not romantic.
It does not bring
unspeakable joy;
nor does it
unfurl tragically
with wistful loves
and clinging hopes.

Misrepresented
as something
desirable,

a writer's life
is pain;
unquenchable,
untouchable,
unsoluable
pain.

Writing
is a form of torture
edged on by a quiet
blaring masochism.

It is a hated addiction,
a compelling conviction,
vomiting and bleeding
all over
a page
in order
to feel
anything
at
all.

A writer's life
is unchosen,
self-infliction
imposed
by the junkie
dragons lurking
beneath uncertain
skin.

Self-absorbtion
follows inevitably,
incessantly,
a quest
for freedom
unfounded,
unfiltered,
unfettered,
by the increasing
need for more and more and
more;
going deeper
and deeper
(feel it digging
and reaching
and scraping below;
black tentacles
pushing inwards)
than ever before.

Tie it off,
shoot it up,
and let the ink
flow through
veins;
stained blood
passing through
thrust onwards
and over
and through
the circuit
as it paints
the inside
black; washing,
contaminating,
simultaniously
cleansing
as it flows back out
onto
the page.

A writer's life
is no kind of living at all.

Posted: 4/18/2005, 1:16 am
by beautiful liar
...tonight, i died.

and then...i came back to life.

being resurrected leaves you feeling sort of hollow, and weary.

what am i living for?

but what was i dying for?

i should figure that out before i kill myself again.

Posted: 4/18/2005, 5:38 pm
by Rusty
Some good writing there.

Posted: 4/18/2005, 5:41 pm
by Rusty
So this is how my month has gone:

1) Best friends parents get divorced.
2) Sister's roommate becomes total bitch and upsets my sister.
3) Acquantances(sp) mother dies.
4) Grandmothers very good friend becomes very ill, will die soon.
5) Dad's friend dies.

What a lovely month April is.

Posted: 4/24/2005, 12:50 am
by beautiful liar
can't sleep.

oi. after 1 night of good sleep, i can never sleep the next night. no wonder i'm always tired.

Posted: 4/24/2005, 1:26 pm
by Rusty
Poor Claire.:(

Posted: 4/26/2005, 9:48 pm
by beautiful liar
BOYS are SO FRUSTRATING!

the guy i like says he wont go out with me becuase he feels like the big bad wolf and i'm like little red riding hood, according to him he's old and broken and i'm young and fragile.

he's so sweet, but it's like being repeatedly stabbed. he's wonderful, and i want to beat him up because of it.

Posted: 4/27/2005, 7:32 pm
by Rusty
Awww, you're getting closer to it. Just keep explaining to him that you're old enough and mature enough to make your own decisions. He'll come around soon enough.

Posted: 4/27/2005, 8:17 pm
by beautiful liar
i hopes so!

Posted: 4/27/2005, 9:41 pm
by beautiful liar
i am WAYYY too hyper.

too much excitement for claire today!

Posted: 4/30/2005, 12:04 pm
by beautiful liar
i have to go in and tell my boss i'm not going to be at work next saturday.
and find someone to cover me.
im scared :\

Posted: 4/30/2005, 12:48 pm
by xoNoDoubt69
calling out is always easier then doing that!