ClumsyMonkey.net

Cass wrote:Aww, I'm sorry. I wish people didn't do things like that. They must have no clue or they'd never say anything like that.

meh... its the people who know that say it. its amazing the range of reactions people get looking at a ghost.

I was going to make my own thread to discuss this, but I don't think that it's really necessary.

But I think I have a problem, and I don't know if I should get help or not. I live with 3 other girls at college, and they're all bonding together, but in a different way that I want to bond with friends. So I'm kind of drifting away from them, which doesn't really bother me, because I don't really want to be best buddies with them. Anyways, I constantly think that they're talking about me, and if I hear my name in conversation, I overanalyze everything and think that they're saying mean things. I know that what I think they mean is completely different from what they actually mean. My mind can process this, but I can't help but think that they meant something else.

I wonder if that makes any sense at all, but I really just want to get some input from whoever wants to share. I thought that I would grow out of this by the time I reached 19, but it doesn't seem like it's going to fix itself anytime soon.

Does anyone else have a problem similar to this?

Well I live with my parents still so I can't really say. Chances are they aren't saying mean things about you. If you find out that they actually are, either ignore them and hang out with some of your other friends or confront them about it and try to work it out. You don't neccessarily need to bond with them and be the best of buddies but maybe if you hung out with them once in a while, you would get to know each other better, and you wouldn't have as much fear or tension around them.

Arlie, I know where you're coming from, having housemates and all.

Here's what I suggest. Nip it now. I would advise you to discuss things with everyone. Be open and honest. I know it's a tough thing, to confront people about things, but from my experience, and from talking to my friends who have had the same experience, it can help solve problems. Communication is key and it's definitely something you want in a house.

You don't have to be buddy-buddy with them. Just maybe mention to one of them (or all) that you feel left out of the loop. That might help include you with them and take away from the chances of them talking about you. Odds are though that it's purely in your head.

I dunno that's my best advice. Paranoia isn't fun, so you might as well try and get things straight.

Yeah, see, the thing is I know they're not saying things about me in a bad tone. I KNOW it. It's just that I still have this feeling in my head that they had a hidden meaning, or something. But my conscience tells me that I'm overreacting.

I don't know it's hard to explain. I don't seclude myself from them, we go out all the time, pretty much every weekend, and we're going out tomorrow for St. Patty's Day, but I'm just not as close with them as they are with each other.

I just can't help this anxious feeling all the time, and I really want it to end.

oh ok gotcha.

well there's two ways to go about this. 1. plant microphones around the house monitoring everyone's conversations, or 2. simply realizing that it's in your head and that you have absolutely no reason to be paranoid. Just tell yourself that it's stupid to waste so much mind energy on something that doesn't exist.

I'd opt with #1. Although you might hear like, weird stuff you dont want to know.

Try writing it out in a journal or something. Just anyway you can think of to get the feelings out, so you can work it out as you write. Remind yourself they aren'y saying anything bad about you. Or try talking to them and each share something about each other so you can all get to know each other a little better.

As a fellow female my advice is this.
You could make an effort to hang out with them. That way you could understand where they are coming from a little more and they will probably think better of you.
I've heard lots of people think that other people talk about them behind their back. A lot of the time its true, but in a way that isn't what you think it is. If your friends with someone your name will likely come up in discussion and thats something you'll have to deal with but just keep in mind that their opinion of you will always come from you.

Thanks guys, I really appreciate all the input. It's just hard living with girls when I'd much rather just be friends with guys. Haha, it's SO much easier!

I'm right now living with 5 girls, so I understand completely how difficult it can be lol

Ok.
So tonight was like the worst night ever to infinity.

It was apparently, my birthday dinner. SO alot of guests/family came over etc.

Heres how it starts. All afternoon before i was getting yelled at, for one reason or another. Then people came, and it was "lets play pretend happy!". So then, there isnt a SPECK of vegetarian friendly food on the table. As most/all of you know, i've been a vegetarian for 5 or so years. NOT ONE SPEC. Then, after that, i was offered meat by several different people. People who are apparently supposed to love me and know me? Whatever.

So then i was just sitting there, wishing i could be anywhere else, and a discussion comes about regarding my "teenage attitude". So i had to sit, ON MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY DINNER listening to HOW I'm a bad kid and this and that. So finally i get up and leave, go TWO rooms away, and say something along the lines of "Fuck this, i'm leaving" and ALL OF A SUDDEN theres like GASPS and all this shit. They heard me. My mum came in, SCREAMED at me, then dragged my by the arm to APOLOGIZE for MY word choice and how TERRIBLE it is.

I dont know how i could be helped, i just had to like vent. What the HELL should i do.
I..
A) want to kill myself.
B) run away
c) kill all of them(family/friends).

that sucks ass. it actually does.
but sinead, don't kill yourself. or kill them. it's not worth it.

Wow. You really do need to move to another province.

Honestly, instead of holding a grudge against your parents and trying to ignore them for a while and let them figure out what morons they are, tell them. It will work out better. I don't mean have a Dr. Phil moment where you get a therapy session and work it all out, I mean yell and scream and tell them what a crappy birthday you had and how you feel like shit and its all their fault. (Well don't say shit because that will just upset them again. heh) but yeah. Make them feel guilty and make sure you have a retort for everything they throw at you. "You were being antisocial!" "You alienated me!" and so on until you demand an apology.

I once asked my dad "are you fucking crazy?" after he lost his head over some ridiculouslt trivial and imaginary slight and he beat the shit out of me.

seriously?

Yes

Yeah, that's one word that I said to my dad once and learned never to direct it at him again.

Well i've told them both to fuck off. They didnt hit me or anything, but I tried talking to them, and Jesuit Crustacean, they just went off about how I'M a fucking problem child.

Today they both apologized though.. not without adding in sentiments like "You need to get along with people better" etc.

So i guess its o-k. They're driving me to the campsite tomorrow, i'm going camping with my friends at Rathtrevor. I geuss its ok. I'm still burned though.

And Alex: once i told my dad something along the lines of "Well i'm just your fucking problem child" when i was maybe.. 14, and he leathered me like 7 times with his belt.
So yeah.

Is it sick to wish i was an orphan? Probably.

Yes.

You really got whipped with a belt? Wow. My Dad's not one to shy away from physical punishment if one deserves it, and he's never used a belt on us, although his dad did on him.