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Posted: 10/19/2005, 9:47 am
by happening fish
Someone's in the kitchen with Bob Dole,
someone's in the kitchen with Bob Dole,
someone's in the kitchen with Bob Dole...
that's really all I've got right now. Say, do you know, does Bob Dole cook?
Posted: 10/19/2005, 9:49 am
by happening fish
Oh Joe Camel, oh don't you cry for me!
You gave my uncle cancer but you'll pay the lawyer's fee!
Posted: 10/19/2005, 10:08 am
by Johnny
Gimme_Shelter wrote:Chanandler Bong wrote:Ashlee is kinda hot as a blonde.
no she isnt
I'd hit it.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 10:23 am
by beautiful liar
i just whacked my back against the ledge in the shower. it fuckin hurts!
i got an A+ on my first english paper

Posted: 10/19/2005, 10:52 am
by joe_canadian
Congratulations Clairey!
That's a hell of an accomplishment.

Posted: 10/19/2005, 12:11 pm
by beautiful liar
fanks joshy

Posted: 10/19/2005, 12:25 pm
by thirdhour
Gimme_Shelter wrote:i cant believe somebody else says fuckshit
usually i say shitfuck, but i thought i'd mix things up.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 1:32 pm
by Gimme_Shelter
thats impressive
Posted: 10/19/2005, 1:51 pm
by happening fish
I got a forward from my engineer roommate of engineer jokes, which I sent to my mom cause my dad's an engineer and it drives her nuts. It included this joke:
Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said,
>> "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well,
>> I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful
>> woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all
>> her clothes and said, "Take what you want." "The second engineer nodded
>> approvingly, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
I just got an email back from her saying that she had shown him the jokes and he liked them, but "he didn't understand the one with the great bike."
I LAUGHED UNTIL I COULDN'T BREATHE.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 1:58 pm
by I AM ME
Posted: 10/19/2005, 2:00 pm
by Johnny
It took time but I got it.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 2:03 pm
by happening fish
That totally sums up my dad. Not only would he choose the bike, but if you tried to explain to him why it was funny he wouldn't get it, and just defend his choice through a series of rational explanations.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 2:04 pm
by I AM ME
Posted: 10/19/2005, 2:59 pm
by joe_canadian
Today this happened:
Very nice stranger: Hey man, can I talk to you for just a minute?
Me: Sure thing, what's up?
Him: If you were to die right now, what do you think would happen?
Me: (thinking: is he mugging me?) I'm not sure man.
Him: You don't have any idea at all?
Me: Man, I'd normally love to talk about this with you but I really need to study for my midterm tomorrow.
Him: Oh oh, that's cool, can I just give you this pamphlet? *hands me a happy little Christian pamphlet*
Me: Thanks!
Him: So what're you studying for?
Me: Human genetics and ev..o..lution...
Him:

God bless him, he was such a nice guy.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:11 pm
by Random Name
ROFL!
Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:21 pm
by pit_girl1
joe_canadian wrote: ev..o..lution...
I love that you hesitated when you realized who you were talking to...hehehe...
Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:37 pm
by I AM ME
lol i've had to do similar things when talking to a devout protestant friend of mine.
Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:49 pm
by happening fish
joe_canadian wrote:Him: If you were to die right now, what do you think would happen?
Me: (thinking: is he mugging me?) I'm not sure man.
Is it weird that I can picture that exactly in my head?

Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:55 pm
by Axtech
joe_canadian wrote:Today this happened:
Very nice stranger: Hey man, can I talk to you for just a minute?
Me: Sure thing, what's up?
Him: If you were to die right now, what do you think would happen?
Me: (thinking: is he mugging me?) I'm not sure man.
Him: You don't have any idea at all?
Me: Man, I'd normally love to talk about this with you but I really need to study for my midterm tomorrow.
Him: Oh oh, that's cool, can I just give you this pamphlet? *hands me a happy little Christian pamphlet*
Me: Thanks!
Him: So what're you studying for?
Me: Human genetics and ev..o..lution...
Him:


God bless him, he was such a nice guy.
Why weren't you and Jess in pysch?!
Posted: 10/19/2005, 3:56 pm
by happening fish
They were busy converting to creationism, dumbass.