:O
Posted: 10/28/2005, 1:50 pm
Dear Sir,
I just recieved your letter ragarding the bill you say I owe you., stating that you would cause me alot of trouble. As you say this bill should have been paid a long time ago but, it wasn't.
Speaking of trouble, let me enlighten you. In 1965, I bought an old truck, two ponies, a breach loading shot gun, a tractor, a colt revolver and a pair of fine razor blades. The next year my sawmill burnt down and didn't leave a damned thing but a pile of ashes. One of my ponies died and I lent the other one to a son-of-a-bitch who let him starve to death.
Then I joined the church, two years later my father died and my brother was hung for some reason or another. A traveling salesman kknocked up my daughter and I had to give a doctor $500 to keep the little bastard from becoming a relative of mine. In 1973 one of the boys came down with the mumps and the mumps went down on him. He had to be castrated to save his life. One day I went fishing and lost the biggest jackfish that I ever saw, one of my sons fell out of the boat and drowned, not the one who was castrated.
The next year my wife ran off with an INdian and left me with a pair of Indian kids as souveniers. So I married the hired firl to keep down expenses. She was a cold bitch and I had trouble make her go off. So I went to a doctor and he advised me to create sp,e excitement about the she was ready. So I took my gun to bed with me. When I thought she was ripe I stuck the gun out the window and fired it. Well, to make a long story short, my wife shit the bed, I ruptured myself and I shot the best cow I ever owned.
In 1983, the of my buildings burned down and I took to drinking. I never stopped until I had nothing left but a Timex watch and a liver and kidney problem. For some time, all I did was wind my watch and run for a piss. My wife got a dose from hanging around the bar all the time and some bastard shot the balls off my best bull. Right now I am so damned broke that if it cost me a nickel to shit, I would vomit.
Trying to get money out of me would be like trying to shove butter up a wild dog's ass with a hot nail.
Now, if you can cause me trouble, you're welcome to try.
Yours sincerely,
I just recieved your letter ragarding the bill you say I owe you., stating that you would cause me alot of trouble. As you say this bill should have been paid a long time ago but, it wasn't.
Speaking of trouble, let me enlighten you. In 1965, I bought an old truck, two ponies, a breach loading shot gun, a tractor, a colt revolver and a pair of fine razor blades. The next year my sawmill burnt down and didn't leave a damned thing but a pile of ashes. One of my ponies died and I lent the other one to a son-of-a-bitch who let him starve to death.
Then I joined the church, two years later my father died and my brother was hung for some reason or another. A traveling salesman kknocked up my daughter and I had to give a doctor $500 to keep the little bastard from becoming a relative of mine. In 1973 one of the boys came down with the mumps and the mumps went down on him. He had to be castrated to save his life. One day I went fishing and lost the biggest jackfish that I ever saw, one of my sons fell out of the boat and drowned, not the one who was castrated.
The next year my wife ran off with an INdian and left me with a pair of Indian kids as souveniers. So I married the hired firl to keep down expenses. She was a cold bitch and I had trouble make her go off. So I went to a doctor and he advised me to create sp,e excitement about the she was ready. So I took my gun to bed with me. When I thought she was ripe I stuck the gun out the window and fired it. Well, to make a long story short, my wife shit the bed, I ruptured myself and I shot the best cow I ever owned.
In 1983, the of my buildings burned down and I took to drinking. I never stopped until I had nothing left but a Timex watch and a liver and kidney problem. For some time, all I did was wind my watch and run for a piss. My wife got a dose from hanging around the bar all the time and some bastard shot the balls off my best bull. Right now I am so damned broke that if it cost me a nickel to shit, I would vomit.
Trying to get money out of me would be like trying to shove butter up a wild dog's ass with a hot nail.
Now, if you can cause me trouble, you're welcome to try.
Yours sincerely,
