ClumsyMonkey.net

Change in plans. I have to drive to Los Angeles tonight because the audio comentary for the DVD that comes with In A Coma is being recorded there this week. Check back for celebrity blogger appearances. Check the sidebar for new pages.

Tomorrow I’m going to watch 16 videos and comment on how bad some of them are and how some would have been better had I been an American and on an American label with lots of American money and a shiny haircut and fangs and your naked sister grinding my leg. And, of course, some I will watch and say ‘wow Bill, that wasn’t so bad’.

Yes this blog is now the first page that you get when you type up matthewgood.org. Yes all of the pages that you’ll ever need for information about all those things that you like can be found by sliding your mouse over to the menu on the left. Yes we’ll be adding way more audio and video and yada-ya. Yes this is the place to find news when new shows are announced or other neat things occur.

You’ll find it all here mixed in with all the depressing geopoli and the slapstick and razzmatazz.

When something’s going to be released or there is unique content, there’ll be an unavoidable banner up top for you to gleefully clickity-click-click. Yes there will be a merch page, it’s coming today. Yes iPod Rip is the coolest program known to man. Yes you should receive daily Version Tracker updates because it’s chalked full of secret handshakes. Yes there is a new page where you can see all of the things that I read each and every day before my electroshock and banana-split. Yes I am in Los Angeles.

So what.

Tomorrow I’m going to watch 16 videos and comment on how bad some of them are and how some would have been better had I been an American and on an American label with lots of American money and a shiny haircut and fangs and your naked sister grinding my leg. And, of course, some I will watch and say ‘wow Bill, that wasn’t so bad’.

Hey, did you know that in 2004 world military spending was just over 1 trillion dollars? Did you know that that constitutes a 5% increase from the year before? And did you know that the freedom-loving, ass-kicking, human rights protectin’ US of A accounts for about one half of that? Did you know that that equals the expenditures of the next 32 nations combined?

Seems to me that the best thing to do is to hurry the hell up and buy some weapons and get ready for the big dance because there’s no such thing as a country that spends that much on killing machines that isn’t down with using them. When Hitler annexed the Sudetenland and the Rhineland he told everyone that his nice new army was just repatriating a few bits of land that really ought to be a part of Germany anyway (and some Yankee bankers helped bankrolled his bank too). A few years later it was clear that his idea of a few bits of land was actually the whole world. No one has more nukes and better guns and planes and tanks than everyone else just for kicks.

No one.

The kicker, of course, is that to defend yourself you’re going to probably have to buy weapons from the very same folks that have it in for you. And really, you have to give it to them, because that’s some eye-poppin’ business savvy.

So, instead of going the weapons route, we could always use our bodies to make our point. We could refuse to strike back and sacrifice ourselves to show that we would rather die than be forced to stoop so low. That is, after all, what Jesus did and what he would do now were he here turning crap into corndogs and sewer water into Fanta. And that strategy applies to all the war-lovin’, gun totin’, fundamentalist nut jobbin’, small brained, megalomaniacs out there, from street thugs to satellite intel sporting ideologues. They’re all the same, just different shades of gray. And they can all lick the worst part of my ass. The downside, of course, is that when you’re dealing with folks that love to bathe in blood, it might not make a difference. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be deep-sixed than forced to join the ranks of those that shoot first, have a few drinks, and then get to the questions. Call me an idealist. Hell, if Jesus can be one, why the hell can't we?

xjsb125 wrote:Johnathan, it appears Matt will be playing Edmonton on July 28. You should go!