ClumsyMonkey.net

girl: "eww."
boy: "what?"
girl: "your face."

rest of class: " ..."

20 minutes later...

class: (all of a sudden, in the middle of a test) " "

The Oracle: You're a bastard.
Agent Smith : Well you should know...., mom.

NO quotes of movies not everyone has seen

YOU RUINED THE MOVIE YOU

Meh. It's not like each and every single one of us are gonna see it. Therefore, it's not much of a loss.

You wanna know the plot?!?!?!
It ends.

I just ruined the movie for all of you fools that plan on wasting prescious moments of your life watching this crap.

Rufus Wainwright wrote:"Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, fuck you, I'm out."

ok i know ive heard this before but where???


"before you make fun of someone, walk a mile in their shoes, then your a mile away from them and thiy are barefoot"

"how diffrent were their movements from those of the calm skilled dwarves---well almost all the dwarves. ignoring the calls of bruenor and dagnabbit, Thibbledorf pwent and his gutbusters assembled into thier own formation, unique to their tactics. they called it a charge, but to Drizzt and Cattie-Brie it more resembled an avalanche. Pwent and his boys whooped, hollered, and scrambled headlong into the darkness of the forest shadows in pursuit of the orcs, leaping through the first line of brush with gleefull abbandon
" the orcs may have set a trap," Cattie-Brie warned. "showing us a small part o' their forces to drag us into their webs."
Cries resounded within the boughs, just south of the caravan, and flora and fauna, and orc body parts, began to fly wildly all about the area the gutbusters had entered.
"Stupid orcs, then." Drizzt replied.

"My willy hurts."

~ some guy in my Socials class.

"Shake that poo!"

~ former MuchMusic VJ, Rainbow Sun Francks

"A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it." -Agent Kay, Men In Black

me, yelling at Kasia from across the room: "Hey, Kasia, where'd Santa go?"

kasia, obviously yelling back: "He went back to change!"

me, obviously being deaf: "He went back to his cage?!?!"

we were talking about playing chicken with floor waxers
"I'll make you shiny and hard!!!!"

Pirates of the Caribbean Best Quotes :

Will Turner: This is either madness... or brilliance.

Jack Sparrow: It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide.
~~~~
This one made me laugh all day :

Jack Sparrow: [looking at all the swords] Who makes all these?

Will Turner: I do! And I practice with them three hours a day!

Jack Sparrow: You need to find yourself a girl mate. Or perhaps the reason you practice three hours a day is that you already found one, and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet. You're not a eunuch are you?


~~~~

one more :

Elizabeth: That's it, then? That's the secret, grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow. You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum.

Jack Sparrow: Welcome to the Caribbean, love.


~~~ johnny depp shimmy-ing is the sexiest thing on the planet

"I believe gay marriages should be between a man and a women "

guess who said that one

George Bush???

"The only way you truly know that you care about acting on a thought is if you talk yourself into, and then out of doing it atleast a thousand times."

"At least I don't talk to my Legolas poster"

I love bumper stickers.

"Melissa, do you realized we are critiquing cardboard"
- Me on critiquing a life-sized Legolas cardboard stand up


...Later that night

Melissa < "Joanne I love cardboard, i laid down and put him on top of me to see if me and orlando can have sex easily"

I love my friends