TTYNKAM (TYPDCAA) IV
- Long Jonny
- Oskar Winner: 2005
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- Location: Toronto, Canada
- Sufjan Stevens
- Oskar Winner: 2005
- Posts: 6738
- Joined: 3/17/2002, 12:25 pm
- Location: Detroit, MI
Yeah, I've gone through a lot. I haven't had a will to live for the past three years now, and well, yeah. Nothing's going to change, and I deserve better than what I have. What can I say?
I faced death. I went in with my arms swinging. But I heard my own breath and had to face that I'm still living. I'm still flesh. I hold on to awful feelings. I'm not dead... My chest still draws breath. I hold it. I'm buoyant. There's no end.
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- Oskar Winner: 2004
- Posts: 2334
- Joined: 3/15/2002, 11:19 pm
- Location: South Shore MA
I have never understood self mutilation. I've tried it in the past and just felt like it wasn't worth the hassle, even if it was a stress reliever and I felt a little better afterwards. I draw over the scars now with sharpie and make temporary tattoos so I can wear short sleeves again...
Everyone handles things differently =|
Everyone handles things differently =|
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- Sufjan Stevens
- Oskar Winner: 2005
- Posts: 6738
- Joined: 3/17/2002, 12:25 pm
- Location: Detroit, MI
I don't know anymore....maybe when you take handfulls of pills and go to sleep hoping you don't wake up, you might understand....
I faced death. I went in with my arms swinging. But I heard my own breath and had to face that I'm still living. I'm still flesh. I hold on to awful feelings. I'm not dead... My chest still draws breath. I hold it. I'm buoyant. There's no end.
- dream in japanese
- Oskar Winner: 2005
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- Joined: 3/22/2002, 1:29 pm
- Location: i am heaven sent
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- Oskar Winner: 2007
- Posts: 10134
- Joined: 8/16/2003, 2:57 pm
- Location: New Finland
I just keep thinking of some time when I don't live with this shit anymore and I am not relying on people I hate. I can drown myself in misery far too easily...and sometimes I wonder why the hell I am still here but I just hope there will be a time where I can move on and shed myself of the past.
-Sarah
Goodbye you liar,
Well you sipped from the cup but you don't own up to anything
Then you think you will inspire
Take apart your head
(and I wish I could inspire)
Take apart your demons, then you add it to the list.
Goodbye you liar,
Well you sipped from the cup but you don't own up to anything
Then you think you will inspire
Take apart your head
(and I wish I could inspire)
Take apart your demons, then you add it to the list.
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- Oskar Winner: 2004
- Posts: 2334
- Joined: 3/15/2002, 11:19 pm
- Location: South Shore MA
Hopefully I'm going to a party tonight with my friend Andrew... I've never really been to a party before; the friends I have don't GO to parties, or throw parties, and I'm just not popular enough to get invited to them anyways.
I'll decide when I get there wether I'll be drinking or not. I figure I might as well TRY IT before I decide to never do it again. Which may make me sound like a hypocrite after what I said in the Drinkin and Tokin topic <____<
I'll decide when I get there wether I'll be drinking or not. I figure I might as well TRY IT before I decide to never do it again. Which may make me sound like a hypocrite after what I said in the Drinkin and Tokin topic <____<
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Cass wrote:I hate pain. Emotional pain is enough, why do people inflict physical pain on themselves too?
sometimes physical pain is easier to handle then emotional pain .. so you take the pain your feeling in your heart and inflict it somewhere else as a release ..
♥ Joey
[ L J ]
[ Last.fm ]
[ L J ]
[ Last.fm ]
- superboots
- EMO GIRL
- Posts: 7771
- Joined: 6/5/2002, 4:53 pm
- Location: 42.3° N 83.8° W (Funkytown)
- Contact:
when i was depressed in high school, i would feel so upset that sometimes i would do stuff like hurt myself because i wanted the feelings to stop and i thought that maybe inflicting pain would help...it really didn't though
when i mean "hurt myself" i don't mean like cut myself or anything. i would just like squeeze my arms and stuff like that.
when i mean "hurt myself" i don't mean like cut myself or anything. i would just like squeeze my arms and stuff like that.
HARDCORE!!!
OMG. I can't believe I din't think fo you
until now because when I think on
a scale of one to ten you're like YWELVE.
No, seriously?
I <3 my HLP!!!!!
OMG. I can't believe I din't think fo you
until now because when I think on
a scale of one to ten you're like YWELVE.
No, seriously?
I <3 my HLP!!!!!
Physical pain gives you something to take your mind off the emotional pain. And it can be the only way of getting rid of sadness or anger or frustration or things like that. I cut myself once but it just didn't hurt enough. I used to be covered in bruises from hitting myself. I'm much better than I was not that I'm not depressed so much any more, but I'll still find myself doing it sometimes if I get really upset about something.
Open your eyes to nights and days, you close them up and float away
and somehow inbetween you've got to master lying to yourself
you back the cause, get out of school, you get a job, the job gets you
and somehow every day you end up serving somebody else
now if that ain't panic that you're feeling, then you damn well better start
you can drive it into that head of yours with the hammer in your heart.
And it's alriiiiiiiight now, take the world and make it yours again.
and somehow inbetween you've got to master lying to yourself
you back the cause, get out of school, you get a job, the job gets you
and somehow every day you end up serving somebody else
now if that ain't panic that you're feeling, then you damn well better start
you can drive it into that head of yours with the hammer in your heart.
And it's alriiiiiiiight now, take the world and make it yours again.
- superboots
- EMO GIRL
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- joe_canadian
- Oskar Winner: 2006
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- Joined: 3/17/2002, 4:11 pm
- Location: Ontario
- its4am_isanybodyhome
- Posts: 2078
- Joined: 3/15/2003, 7:04 pm
- Location: in hell, with my pet bunnies
- Contact:
Joey wrote:Cass wrote:I hate pain. Emotional pain is enough, why do people inflict physical pain on themselves too?
sometimes physical pain is easier to handle then emotional pain .. so you take the pain your feeling in your heart and inflict it somewhere else as a release ..
yes, that's how i feel...
-Jillian

member of the pokémon league
i wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
if i don't make it know that i've loved you all along
when you are with me i'm free
that hazy moon will be ash in the wind real soon

member of the pokémon league
i wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
if i don't make it know that i've loved you all along
when you are with me i'm free
that hazy moon will be ash in the wind real soon
I donno, even if it does feel good i completely disagree with hurting yourself. I understand the concepts and reasons behind it but its by no means a healthy way or release.
It really sad when someone has such a low oppinion of themselves that they have to hurt their body.
And im not talking about sad in a pathetic type of way.
It really sad when someone has such a low oppinion of themselves that they have to hurt their body.
And im not talking about sad in a pathetic type of way.