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by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 2:03 pm

I have wright a letter to my department head in order for me to change my major, and i was hoping you guys could help me out on grammar and stuff like that because i suck. thanks.

I am writing to you to let you know that I wish to change my major for this year. I would like to change my major from Natural Resources to Marine Biology.

I originally came to this school for Marine Biology, and then I started to get into my classes in the Plant and Environmental Science department, and thought that was where I belonged. Up until the end of last year that is what I thought, but then I started to get involved with the Marine Biology club and my Marine Biology class. When I had thought of changing my major last year it had gotten to be too late and I was unable to change it. So I spent the summer, especially the last few weeks were I started to lose sleep because of the matter, thinking about changing my major. I would like to thank you for taking your time to read this.

by **starseed_10** » 9/12/2004, 2:17 pm

a) Dont start a sentence with "And" in the context that you did.

b) "So I spent the summer, especially the last few weeks were I started to loose sleep of the matter" isn't even a sentence.

I don't know if i'd even include this idea, but if you want to, then go with something like "So I spent the summer, especially the last few weeks, losing sleep over the matter"

c) the ending is way too sudden. Go with something like,
"(new paragraph) In conclusion, i'd like to thank you for taking the time to read this, and i'd appreciate a change if at all possible."

then sign it and everything at the bottom.

oh, and by the way, aren't you in grade 10 or something? why do you have a major?

by **Joey** » 9/12/2004, 2:19 pm

take out the word "gotten"

instead of:

"When I had thought of changing my major last year it had gotten to be too late"

try ..

"When I thought of changing my major last year it was already too late to make any changes"

Just my thoughts

Marine Biology .. good choice :thumbs:

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 2:21 pm

I am in 11 and it is just what my school calls it to make it easier. and most of that i have fixed and am now going to fix the ending

by **Axtech** » 9/12/2004, 2:21 pm

by **Joey** » 9/12/2004, 2:22 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 2:23 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 2:50 pm

well I am going to go with the above one unless someone puts in suggestions by the time i go to sleep. i may be posting another one because my mom has to write something about this as well to the principal

by **Axtech** » 9/12/2004, 3:15 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 3:44 pm

by **christa lynn** » 9/12/2004, 3:51 pm

"I have spent the summer, especially the last few weeks, thinking about changing my major and I have come to the conclusion that I should."

I don't think you need to put in the part about losing sleep.

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 4:05 pm

i was told i should by my counslor

by **starseed_10** » 9/12/2004, 7:07 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 7:10 pm

by **Axtech** » 9/12/2004, 7:17 pm

by **starseed_10** » 9/12/2004, 7:17 pm

by **starseed_10** » 9/12/2004, 7:18 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 7:22 pm

:O thats great, but lets combine the two to:

I have been greatly concerned about changing my major all summer, to the point that i've lost sleep over the issue, and I would be relieved if I could get this all sorted out.

by **Rusty** » 9/12/2004, 7:40 pm

by **Penguin Josh** » 9/12/2004, 7:43 pm

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