For every 100 girls...

[Johnny]

Lando has cooties.

[Lando]

The kind that attracts women to me. This is true.

[Johnny]

Word!


I need those cooties too. Share dammit!

[laurel]

when he says women, he means in the singular form. or at least he better!

but i must say, if you have those cooties, you'll get yourself a damn good woman. and yes, i am only slightly conceited.

[Lando]

hey, I can't help it if I'm irresistible. Women want me, and my girlfriend beats them up!

[Neil]

hey, I can't help it if I'm irresistible. Women want me, and my girlfriend beats them up!

haha, nice.

[crustine]

hahah

[laurel]

hey, I can't help it if I'm irresistible. Women want me, and my girlfriend beats them up!

women know better than to want you. they fear my wrath. seriously. watch out. i'm the toughest, smallest, 5'2" ass kicker around.

[Lando]

or you're just small and sweet and most people aren't too afraid of you, except for my friend trevor.

[laurel]

trevor better watch his back.

he may be twice my height, but that doesn't stop me. although lately he doesn't seem to fear me as much. i must be sure to fix that to keep up my rep.

[Lando]

yeah you're slipping!

[Johnny]

Would I be afraid of Laurel too?

[Lando]

Probably. She's only scary if you look her in the eyes. Like Medusa, but she doesn't have snakes for hair and you won't turn to stone, but you might pee yourself in fear.

[laurel]

my eyes are blue.

not pee-making scary.

[Lando]

when you have the angry glare they scare trevor, because it's definitely not your size he finds threatening!

[laurel]

he runs away from me when i walk menacingly towards him, though.

and i don't have an angry glare!

....i don't think. do i?

[Lando]

you don't think? how do you function!?

[laurel]

well, when i'm with you, you're in charge of general reasoning.

otherwise, i just go on autopilot and hope for the best.