The CM's To Kill List II

[thirdhour]

corporations are people too!!!:P

(legally, i mean)


KILL THEM ALL!!

[superboots]

could I kill my mind?
wait, if I did that, I would just end up killing all of me.
nevermind.

[Penguin Josh]

The people who thoght up the "can you hear me now" comercials, they are corupting our youth!

I was in wal-mart yesterday and some kid started saying "can you hear me now," and I broke down in tears right then and there, everyone thought I was crazy.

[xoNoDoubt69]

People who talk to freakin loud on their cell phones in public

[Fras]

The creater of the Gap commericals, the people who produced the Gap commercials, the people IN the gap commercials and the people who thought it'd be good to ruin good TV shows by putting 'Pretty white people' in them. (like Brady bunch and The dating game)

MmmmmmmWAAH!!! *dating game kiss*

[Bandalero]

the original author of this e-mail. i wrote my remarks just after his little line, so anything in *here* is my remark and that last little part is mine too. oh and since this e-mail is going around maybe you can spread this one too, well anyway:

heh, this e-mail was funny, but i can top it. everything you see in *here* is my coment to the line above it, this is going to be fun.

Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as
we have......
*heh, your old*

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same
cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't
seem to get food poisoning.
My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter AND I used to eat
it raw sometimes too, but I can't remember getting E-coli.
*yes that's right and you also misused anti-biotics and other medicines making bacteria and germs alot more immune to modern medicine and treatments. i'm sure SARS is just a mutated version of something old, that your responsible for because you didn't take all of your pills or misused others*

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or
cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had no helmets.
*these same people who used to do that are constantly griping and moaning to their kids to wear helmets and protective gear, they want legislature to pass laws and rules for those types of bottles that make it really hard for an adult to open but yet the kid can easily open it, how ironic*

We played with toy guns, cowboys and Indians, army, cops and
robbers, and used our fingers to simulate guns when the toy ones
or my BB gun was not available.
*toy guns were cool man, but someone got a fly up their butt and decided to go all PC correct and make those toy guns either hard to find or out right illegal...and you can't play cowboys and indians, it's cowboys and native americans, can't call them indians anymore*

Some students weren't as smart as others or didn't work hard so
they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade.
That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers and
problem solvers. We had the freedom, failure, success and
responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.
*ah...yes, education. thank god TAKS is comming along and is going to hold kids back. good old standardized tests. they make teachers worry too much on what that test is going to cover that they make sure it's built into the students head. forget everything else man, we don't need to cover that, we just need to worry about a test that is going to ultimately tell a child future for them. just cover what's on the test, no real imput from the teacher, just generic education. the same generic education that will not produce risk-takers, and problem solvers. the same generic education that makes kids wear the samn damn thing over and over again....we can't have an independent soul roaming the halls with his shirt tucked out, or an off colored shirt, or his schackles removed. you are lucky, you did have the freedom to think by yourself, the responsability to dress yourself, and you indeed learded how to deal with everything.*

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the lake
instead of a pristine pool (talk about boring), the term cell
phone would have conjured up a phone in a jail cell, and a pager
was the school PA system.
*this must have come from a prep ass guy, what pool? what lake? hell, i didn't swim in a FRESH body of water till i went to La Pryor, and when i accidently took in a mouth full of water i said hey...this water is good cause it didn't have salt water or chlorine.*

We all took gym, not PE... and risked permanent injury with a
pair of high top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having
cross-training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built in
light reflectors. I can't recall any injuries but they must have
happened because they tell us how much safer we are now. Flunking
gym was not an option... even for stupid kids!
I guess PE must be much harder than gym.
*athletics...football cleats are not comfortable shoes, especially if they have gone though a season or two. (and in many cases, 10-15) light reflectors? when were your school hours? i've never heard of having a gym class at night? and you would think gym class would take place in gym...a lighted building...how old are you?*

Every year, someone taught the whole school a lesson by running
in the halls with leather soles on linoleum tile and hitting the
wet spot. How much better off would we be today if we only knew
we could have sued the school system.
*kids don't sue schools, their parents do, the same parents that were young once and did this type of thing. they are too lazy to work, hate their jobs and want to find an easy way to make money fast...way to go role models, is it any wonder why kids look up to athletes and rock stars?*

Speaking of school, we all said prayers and the pledge and stayed
in detention after school and caught all sorts of negative
attention for the next two weeks.
We must have had horribly damaged psyches.
*well you like to sue everyone and their mother over something, i guess you guys do. just go to work like a normal person, raise your kids normally, not like people do today or yesterday, and get the hell out of court, you have no real buisness there dammit.*

I can't understand it. Schools didn't offer 14 year olds an
abortion or condoms (we wouldn't have known what either was
anyway) but they did give us a couple of aspirin and cough syrup
if we started getting the sniffles.
What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school
nurses? Ours wore a hat and everything.
*heh, old people. look who's offering the condoms...people your age. maybe if parents were raising their children right and watching what they see on tv, what they hear on the radio, and WATCHED WHAT THEY READ, this wouldn't be a problem. legislators and other people should not be respopnsible for your kids, you are, and you need to raise your child, not the state*

I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something before I
was allowed to be proud of myself.
*no, as i have found out you can have a self esteem. of course you don't learn that in school because well, self esteem is not on the TAKS.*

I just can't recall how bored we were without computers,
PlayStation, Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital cable stations.
*i don't like to be the last generation that actually went out to play. so i'm asking this generation to do what today's parents don't do, cut work a little early, get out of traffic, stop eating out and play some catch or something with your kids. alot of surveys out in the world say that americans are lazy and fat and what not. they forget that americans work more hours then anyone else in the world and belive it or not, they come home from work a little tired. but c'mon people an hour to play with your kids everyday...before we all evolve into fat globs of nothing, with one finger to type on the keyboard.*

I must be repressing that memory as I try to rationalize through
the denial of the dangers could have befallen us as we trekked
off each day about a mile down the road to some guy's vacant lot,
built forts out of branches and pieces of plywood, made trails,
and fought over who got to be the Lone Ranger. What was that
property owner thinking, letting us play on that lot. He should
have been locked up for not putting up a fence around the
property, complete with a self-closing gate and an infrared
intruder alarm.
*yeah, why can't people play in vacant lots anymore? what's that about? i'll tell you what it's about....the wussification of america. now a days you have so many plastic toys and crap that is suppose to be safe for kids, c'mon man kids need to get dirty, it helps with the immune system and natural body systems. todays kids are constantly breathing recycled air and are indoors almost all day. that's not helping the rate of asthmatics and allergy kids. no don't blame the air pollution outside, the o-zone hole is cut in 1/2, and some experts say it will seal back up completely.*

Oh yeah... and where was the Benadryl and sterilization kit when
I got that bee sting? I could have been killed!
*read above allergy topic ^. and what's wrong with having modern medicine around? i seriously think your generation has a problem with medicine, you like to use it unecessarily, but you call other generations soft when it comes to new stuff*

We played king of the hill on piles of gravel left on vacant
construction sites and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48
cent bottle of mercurochrome and then we got our butt spanked.
Now it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose
of a $49 bottle of antibiotics and then Mom calls the attorney to
sue the contractor for leaving a horribly vicious pile of gravel
where it was such a threat.
*mommy used to play on those rocks too, now she is sueing and sending her kids to the hospital...gee i wonder why? was it because it is dangerous to be hanging around construction sites. $49 for antibiotics that are re-formulated because the past generation misussed them, then they bitch and moan because of the new price.*

We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either because if we
did, we got our butt spanked (physical abuse) ... and then we got
our butt spanked again when we got home.
*and why does this not happen anymore? because you get angry when someone else tries to disipline your kid. but you want others to raise them....make up your mind.*

Mom invited the door to door salesman inside for coffee, kids
choked down the dust from the gravel driveway while playing with
Tonka trucks (remember why Tonka trucks were made tough...it
wasn't so that they could take the rough berber in the family
room), and Dad drove a car with leaded gas.
*mom must have thought the salesman was cute....but i'm not even going to touch that one...you get the idea anyway. leaded gas? jesus man, you are old. wonder why they moved from leaded to unleaded? cause it burned way too fast and because you old school, pot smoking, van driving, tie-die color wearing, tree hugging hippies kept bitching about it. and now you look at the neo, new age, punk rock listening, protesters and call them "un-american". such hipocrits.*

Our music had to be left inside when we went out to play and I am
sure that I nearly exhausted my imagination a couple of times
when we went on two week vacations.
*what the hell does this mean? are you talking about walkman's and cd players and stuff? i think it's funny how you complain about your kids frequently and complain about something that gets the kids out of your hair for a few minutes. hell, at least you went to vacations man, look at the other generations before you, they were lucky to have a car, much less a vacation softee.*

I should probably sue the folks now for the danger they put us in
when we all slept in campgrounds in the family tent.
*you don't get it do you? quit sueing people, what comes around goes around, softee*

Summers were spent behind the push lawnmower and I didn't even
know that mowers came with motors until I was 13 and we got one
without an automatic blade-stop or an auto-drive. How sick were
my parents?
*ah yes, complain about new, improved, and technical inovations. they have a purpose, to improve your life and well being you old coot. of course your parents didn't complain when they had to use the yo-yo, and not push something with wheels*

Of course my parents weren't the only psychos. I recall Donny
Reynolds from next door coming over and doing his tricks on the
front stoop just before he fell off.
*oh but his mom should have told him to wear a helmet, just like you do today to your kids.*

Little did his Mom know that she could have owned our house.
Instead she picked him up and swatted him for being such a goof.
It was a neighborhood run amuck.
*independent souls....punished because they were different. just like today.*

To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that
they were from a dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have
known that we needed to get into group therapy and anger
management classes?
*i don't think no one had to tell them, they just knew. we're sick, we got issues but we ain't going to fix them, were just going to pass them into our kids. and now they don't know they're stupid, someone else has to tell them...bravo!*

We were obviously so duped by so many societal ills, that we
didn't even notice that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac!
How did we survive?
*'How did we survive?' that's easy, you didn't have to deal with the wussafication of america like we do. now there are people who instead of fixing problems they just get rid of something altogether. example, little jonny can't jump rope 30 times in a row before getting the rope tangles in his feet, so what do they do...get rid of the rope....i kid you not, there are jump rope classes today without ropes. because getting your feet tangled in rope is a discouragement, and we can't make kids feel like they are a failure now a days can we? it's pathetic, we need to stop screwing around and raise our own kids, not talk about the old days while you expect the state to raise your kids, there's a time for screwing around and banging the salesman, and when you have a kid is not the right time for that.*

your main objective in life in america today is to:
1. get an education, a good one, not a generic ass education where they teach kids stuff that is only going to be on a standardized test, where they dress them up in cute uniforms and schackles for the pleasure of adults. you need a good education that is going to be useful in life, not what's on paper. kids that constantly get A's in school and are perfect do the worst in college because they go out and screw around too much with their new found freedom, you and I have seen it first hand. with that good education comes #2:

2. a good job. a good job will give you plenty of time where you can:

3. raise your kid. yeah, you can actually come home and see/touch/play your kid instead of watching them sleep. good jobs are few but good people to fill those positions are even rarer.

whoa...i did that? ^

[One-Eye]

That is sick and pathetic. If I ever start yammering about the "good old days" when I'm old, someone please shoot me.

[Axtech]

Okay. Same goes for me. We can kill eachother at the EXACT same time, if it comes to that.

[nelison]

that would suck... what if one person didn't uphold their end of the bargain... that would be just gross

[One-Eye]

That's why you always pack two bullets. One for you, and one for me!

[Lando]

Axtech

[xoNoDoubt69]

Stupid people who shout random things at you

[happening fish]

Lanndo

[Lando]

Alex


Whew, this Double N Lanndo seems to be hated by some people... Damn imposter, that's why you wan't him dead isn't it?

[happening fish]

Exactly! I wasn't even talking about YOU, so why do I get to die now?!

[Lando]

OOps, I meant Alex Trebek, I forgot the last name.... Damn that Alex Trebek and his ANSWER CARDS!!!!

[happening fish]

Yeah! Damn him!

[finding emo]

People who talk to freakin loud on their cell phones in public

People who have EXTREMELY PRIVATE phone conversations on cell phones in public... LOL!

[Axtech]

Axtech

*a tear*

[happening fish]

just one? that's not enough to rescue you from the chopping block, buddy.